The Night of the Raptor
by DynamicUrkel
Summary: After the Arkham Asylum funds have been cut in half, again; Dr. Leland has to pair up cellmates because they just can't afford a one man cell, so now an unlucky inmate will have to be roommates with Will William, formally known as the Raping Raptor who is the most disturbing Gotham villain. Don't Like Don't Read. Warning rape? Read and find out.
1. Chapter 1

"Now Will, tell me about your childhood."

Dr. Leland dealt with crazies before, but never in her life has she dealt with somebody so dangerous. The man before her wore the same uniform as any other inmate, but was covered in chains and ropes holding him down. He had a long pointy nose and blonde buzz-cut.

"Mr. William if you want to make any progress today then you'll need to start talking." Dr. Leland said with a hint of irritation in her voice.

The man spoke up. "Well maybe you need to start stripping because Raping Raptor is coming for you!" He lunged forward with the chains holding him back.

"(Sigh) Guards please take Mr. William back to his cell." She rubbed her forehead and was handed a letter. "What's this?"

"I don't know ma'am, but it's a letter from the city." The security guard answered.

"The city?" She opened it a read it to herself. "Oh God. They're cutting out funds again? This is about the second this month time they've done that."

"Don't know what to tell ya ma'am."

"Looks like we're going to have to pair people up as cellmates, let's see." She opened a file cabinet of all the patients. "Guess this'll be the same as last years; Harley and Isley, Jonathan and Jervis, Jack and Edward…Jack…Joker…didn't he escape last Tuesday?"

"Yes ma'am."

"Oh…well I guess Nigma's going to be alone, who'd be his cell mate?"

"Who do we have left?"

"Well I know somebody who doesn't have a cellmate…"

"Oh God ma'am, not him!" The guard cried.

"I know, but we have no other choice, besides who knows? Maybe socializing with other inmates will make him a little better?"


	2. Hey Riddle Riddle time for a Diddle

Riddler was not happy at all. Right next to him in his cell was none other then Will Williams formally known as the Raping Raptor; a man who'd dress up in a raptor baseball cap, green shorts with a tail attached to it, and a pair of deadly gloves that had a claw like a velociraptor.

"Please put me in another cell!" Edward yelled out in to the empty hallway.

"They can't hear you, we've got alllllll night till the guards get here." Will smiled.

"What do you mean all night?" Looking at his cellmate.

"Well the guards don't usually wake us up for breakfast till eight a.m., so what is it seven p.m.? Yeah we've got a good amount of time left. Oh…and you like riddles right?"

"Yeah…"

"What's long and hard and full of seamen?"

"Oh please that one is obvious, it's a submarine."

"IT'S MAH DICK!" Will leaped in to the air pinning the Riddler down on the bed. Edward tried to push the weirdo off of him but he had a killer grip to his arms.

Looking left and right he couldn't do anything and was about to give up, and then it came to him, he thought up something that would make the Raptor stop.

"Fine."

"What?"

"Well if you want sex I'm cool with that."

"Wait…you want me to rape you?"

"Yeah, let's do it right here right now!"

Will was silent and then spoke out. "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! It's not rape if you're consent with it!"

"So?"

"SO THEN I CAN'T RAPE YOU!" He jumped off the bed and back into his own moping.

"Well…" The Riddler thought to himself. "Should I tell everyone else how to not get raped by him…NAH! After all, what good is a riddle if everyone knows the answer!" He picked up his covers and went back to bed. "What kind of a stupid doctor would even put this guy with another cellmate. I'll just complain about him tomorrow and then we'll never deal with him again…yeah…" He tried sleeping but that last riddle made him die inside and he stayed awake till breakfast.


	3. One Size Hat Fits All

After the complaint Dr. Leland got from the Riddler she decided not to pair them up in a cell anymore, but now what was she supposed to do? They still had a budget cut and they just couldn't afford to have a one person in one cell.

"Let's see." She murmured. Eventually she figured out a trade and handed Edward off to the cell she found him to be most comfortable in.

Edward marched in to the cell with a smug expression plastered on his face. "Hey Jervis."

"Edward? What are you doing in my cell?" He asked.

"Your cell? This is my cell now. Hi Jonathan." Waves over at Scarecrow across the room.

"Eh." Jonathan waved back not looking up from his book.

"So um, you'd best be leaving now Tetch.." Edward pushed Jervis out the door with the guards closing it behind him not letting him get back in his original cell.

"What? But it's my cell!" Looks over at Doctor Leland across the hall. "Dr. Leland Edward just threw me out of _my cell_!"

"I know, that's because we're changing you around to another person's cell."

"But, whatever did I do wrong?" He asked.

"Oh Jervis you didn't do anything wrong, Nygma here just didn't like his old cellmate so we're switching you two out."

"Who was his old cellmate?"

The guards looked at one another awkwardly, neither of them wanting to answer that question.

"No one important, he's kind of like you in a way." Leading him down the hall with two guards behind them.

"How? He better not like Alice because let me tell you something-"

"No Jervis, he doesn't like Alice."

"Oh? Then how are we alike?"

"You'll see."

They came to the cell with Will William sitting on the bed with a hug grin on his face. Jervis almost immediately knew who he was and tried darting back but was stopped by the guards pushing him in the cell.

"PLEASE DON'T PUT ME IN HIS CELL! I'VE HEARD STORIES! THEY'RE NOT NICE STORIES! HE'S APSOLUTELY NOTHING LIKE ME!" The guards finally locked him in behind the glass.

"Jervis don't worry, those are just stories like Alice in Wonderland, they're not true, and you might finally make a friend."

"But I already have friends!" (If he could still call Edward a friend.)

"Shhhhh, no need to thank me; tell you what Jervis."

"What?"

"If you two still don't like each other by tomorrow then you don't have to stay with him from then on, but I doubt you'll want to change cellmates." She walked off with the security guards turning the lights off for each room as they went down the hallway. The Mad Hatter pressed his back to the wall making his way to the corner of the room where he pulled the metal-framed bed toward him for a shield.

"Jervis, is it?" William said coming closer.

"Yes…"

"Well it's nice to meet you." He laid down on the bed blocking Jervis from the rest of the cell. "You know…I used to run the streets of Gotham." He started running his fingers threw Jervis's hair. "But then batman caught me ya know?" He played with the blonde hair a little while, curling it up in his fingers and twirling it. "Wow Jerv, you've got some really nice hair, I used to have blonde hair like this before I shaved it."

"Uhuh."

"Yep." He continued twirling it and paused. "What type of shampoo do you use?"

"I use soap, now if you don't mind I'd like to have my hair back."

"Hm." He twirled the hair and then placed it in his mouth starting to chew it a bit.

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO MY HAIR!?"

"I dunno, but can you believe some people call me weird?"

"Yes I can!"

"Well you're weird yourself Jervy, now can you move out of that corner so I can rape you and your hat, or would you rather keep the hat one and it would be a double rape?" He grabbed the Hatter by the collar and lifted him up pushing him against the wall.

Jervis took out one of his ten by six cards he had been hiding for an emergency and placed it behind the Raping Raptor's ear. "PUT ME DOWN THIS INSTANCE!"

"Ok." He let him down and had the blank expression on his face like all the brainwashed people do.

"Good, now hit your head repeatedly on the wall back there!"

"Ok." He got up from the bed and started hitting his head over and over on the stonewall across the room.

"Ew." Jervis flicked the spit off of his hair and it got stuck on his fingers. "EW!" He jumped off from the corner and started freaking out trying to get the spit off his clean hand. Finally getting it off he stared off at the Raptor hitting his head. "Why?" He sunk back down to the dark corner of the room waiting for Dr. Leland to come back and bring him to another cell.


	4. Too Spooky

"Wow so that really happened?" Riddle asked Jonathan.

"Why of course it did Eddy; after I made Batman pee his pants from fear I successfully burned all the money they had ever collected and the university eventually died from bankruptcy.

"Funny because I saw on the news that the university eventually gained back all their money and are more successful then ever." Looks up at the man entering the room. "Oh hi Jervis, how was your night with William?"

"YOU! UP!" Jervis pointed at Crane. "YOU! YOU'LL DIE TONIGHT!" Points at Nygma.

Jonathan cocked his head to the side. "Get up?"

"Yes, Dr. Leland says since I didn't want to stay there another night she wanted you to go instead!"

"Stay where?"

"Why, with someone who needs your help professor." Dr. Leland poked her head around the corner.

"And what if I refuse."

"Hahahah, you don't have a choice." She laughed as security carried Jonathan down the hall followed by her.

"Where the devil are you taking me!" He dragged his feet on the ground hoping to slow them down.

"Well we found a new cellmate that's exactly like you."

"He enjoys plaguing fear in to the hearts of men?"

"Something like that…" She looked at the ground trying to not look disappointed in herself. "Well, here's your cell."

They appeared in front of the same door with Will sitting on the bed with an even bigger smile and a bandage on his head.

"You must be joking."

"No Mr. Crane, this is not a joke."

"Ew."

"Well I'm sorry but since funds are down the drain we have to do this, and plus, Jervis did mention how you were once friends with him and that you'd probably be the better cellmate."

"Jervis said that?"

"Yes."

"I see." He glared back at the cell he came from which had a little Mad Hatter waving at him from behind the glass. "Well, can't you find someone else to be his roommate, I really don't want to."

"Sorry, but Tetch and Nygma both didn't want to stay."

"What about Harvey Dent?"

"Why would you say Harvey Dent?"

"Uh…" He started fidgeting a bit. "Because Jervis said I was Will's old friend, but it was really Harvey."

"And how would you know that?" She raised an eyebrow.

"Because…" He paused looking away from the cell. "I really don't want to set foot in there."

"Well, you never know unless you try it." She patted him on the shoulder. "Hey, maybe this will help you overcome your fear?"

"DO YOU WANT ME TO BE RAPED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT?!"

"Hey, the other two were fine with it! Now we'll see if you'll still want to be cellmates in the morning, but right now I just don't feel like working on the paperwork." She looked at the guards. "Take him in."

He cried out, "WAIT!" while the guards threw him in and locked the door behind him.

"C'mon it's bed time." The guard turned their light off and continued with the other room lights as he walked away.

Usually Crane would sleep in his bed, but he found it more comfortable to sleep on the ceiling that night. He used the corner of the room as a hold place for his foot and tried keeping himself up by holding on to different corners and sides.

"So you're the legendary Scarecrow I've heard all about?" Raptor tilted his head to the side.

"Yes now leave me alone." There was a hint of irritation in Jon's voice.

"Have you ever imagined raping a scarecrow?"

"No."

"Well neither have I, but I'd love to try it out." He continued to stare at him on the top of the ceiling. "You know sooner or later you'll have to come down."

"Oh I plan on staying here all night."

"Really?"

"Yes."

"Well, what if I could jump up there?"

"Yeah, I'd like to see you try…Wait, please don't try…"

"Hm…he looked at the distance between the two, a probably couldn't without my climbing gloves…say…how did you ever get up there?"

"I'm Scarecrow."

"I see…" He looked around a bit and walked closer till he was near the underneath of him. "You know? I could probably reach your foot."

"You're going to rape a foot?" He asked with a disgusted face.

"No, that'll be silly of me." He walked closer and stood up on his tiptoes starting to caress Jonathan's foot. "You've got some really pretty feet."

"STOP TOUCHING MY FOOT YOU FREAK!"

"Now why would I do a thing like that?"

Jonathan kicked him square in the face and put his foot up higher so it wasn't dangling down. "That's why!"

"Yeah keep trying to resist, but you will become weak, and you will fall." Rubbing his hands together evilly.

In the background Jervis could still see what was going on through his glass door. "Poor Jonny, but better him then me." Looks down at the Riddler. "HEY! Shine my shoes faster shoe-shine boy!"

Nygma had a mind control chip on his neck and dared not to let Jervis activate it. "Sure whatever you say."

"Good, now after your done shinning my shoes you'll start on my hat."

"Again?" He asked in a moping manner.

"Don't back sass me!"

"(SIGH!) Who the heck shines a hat anyway?" He muttered grabbing a brush and started dusting the Mad Hatter's hat.

Back in the other cell, Crane was worried, he knew in a couple of hours or so he will get tired, but until then he tried clearing his mind to focus on not letting this guys get near any of his body parts. The clock went from seven p.m. to five fifty-eight a.m. And he was losing his grip. He tried keeping his eyes open but was failing, and Will saw that and waited in the corner with the biggest grin Crane thinks he's ever seen on anyone, who's not Joker. Finally he couldn't feel his arms anymore and collapsed on the ground where Will picked him up and placed him on the bed.

"Told you that you wouldn't last the night like that."

Crane shivered and tried squirming away but he couldn't pick up enough strength to do anything, the best thing he could do was just lay there, helpless.

"HA! I made the Scarecrow shudder! I am the king of rape!" He got ready to take his shirt off when the guard turned the lights on and opened the door.

"BREAKFAST!" He yelled out to the inmates.

"WHO HAS BREAKFAST AT SIX IN THE MORNING!?" Raping Raptor exclaimed.

"I DO!" Jonathan sprung up from the bed, in that moment of hope all his strength restored, jolting out the door, not once looking back as he dashed down the hallway.

Later:

Around the breakfast table Jervis and Edward were eating a hardy breakfast… that was by Akham standards, when Jonathan pulled up a chair next to them with a single apple.

"So. Did you have a nice night?" Nygma smirked.

"Well, almost being raped by a man claiming to be a Velociraptor is not typically a nice night."

"Are you sore in some places?" He raised an eyebrow, Jervis snickering in the background.

Taking a bite from the apple. "Well of course I am. I'm sore everywhere, why would you ask that?"

"HAHAHAHAHAHAH!" Edward and Jervis busted out in to laughter.

"What?...EW! That's disgusting! NO!" Jonathan threw his apple at Edward's face but they still continued to laugh. "You two shut up! GOSH! Everyone around here would think you were a bunch of five year olds…And I'm going off and complaining to the doctor about the new roommate and hoping to God, aka myself, that you JERVIS get put back in there!" He stormed away.

"HEY JOHN! Are we being a pain in the ass!?" Riddler giggled.

Scarecrow did not mutter a word but flipped the two off.


	5. Two Heads are Better then One

Dr. Leland opened a new bottle of orange juice and started guzzling it down. Already three other inmates complained about Will saying he was going to rape their bodies, but what was she supposed to do? It's not like she was made of money or something, and God forbid they ask Bruce Wayne for some more funds. It's times like this she wished she didn't have to help the insane people of Arkham. "Let's see, who could I pair Mr. William with?" She skimmed the records until she remembered what Professor Crane told her, something about Two-Face being Raptor's friend? She knew it was a dirty lie but she thought Harvey was probably the only person who could defend himself. "Oh Gosh, I'm sending people to a rapist…not only people, crazy unstable people…what kind of a doctor am I?"

A knock suddenly came at her door; it was a guard. "Ma'am, it's about six thirty, who'd you like to put with you know who?"

"Well." She opened the door letting him in. "Maybe we'll work something out?"

Two-Face aka Harvey Dent was told by the doctor he was being given a new cellmate to replace Penguin. He glanced at the glass door when they placed the inmate in the room. "What?" He sat up from his bed when he recognized the man put in front of him. "THIS IS THE RAPING RAPTOR!" He complained to the security guard closing the door behind him.

"Sorry Dent, Doc's orders."

"Guess it's just you and me Harvey." Will smiled very unpleasantly stepping closer and closer. "Just you and meeeeee…..Oh, and big, bad Harv too~" He had his face right next to Harvey's bad side.

"HEY! Don't cause any trouble you!" the guard warned pointing an accusatory finger at the Raptor.

"Oh don't worry officer, I would never want to cause any trouble."

"Oh, ok…" He uncomfortably glanced at the two in the cell and then walked away.

Harvey frowned and looked down at the Raptor. "One step closer and I'll punch your lights out." He warned.

"Now don't be like that Harv, we're roommates now." He touched cheek to cheek. "We're roommates foreverrrrrr, and do you know what roommates doooooo?" He licked the bad side of Two-Face.

"That's it!" He swished back and punched Will straight in the face, breaking his pointy nose.

"OW!" He fell to the floor in pain.

Harvey wiped off his cheek and proceeded to kick the man already down on the floor. "Yeah we're roommates forever so I hope you enjoy getting your ass kicked forever!"

"NOT FOREVER! I WAS JUST OVER EXAGERATING!"

He stopped and pulled out his quarter. "We kill him or not!" He asked himself.

"Ooooooh, heads or tails is it? Well I think heads is the best answer." Wiggles eyebrows.

Harvey kicked him again and caught the coin landing on his good side. "DARN!"

"What? I live?!"

"Yeah, but soon your gonna wish you weren't." He kicked him harder.

"OW! I totally don't deserve this!"

"Sure." After a few hours of kicking the Raptor repeatedly, his foot started hurting and he was getting bored. He looked at the clock down the hall and decided it was best to go to bed. He lifted up his metal-framed bed and threw it on top of Will. He sat on top, pulled his covers over, and went to sleep. Unfortunately, Will was not as comfortable, seeing as how he was stuck underneath of it and couldn't get out without physically moving it off of him, so he just laid there and waited till breakfast.

"Worst…night…EVER!" He murmured.


	6. Baby it's Cold Inside

She was surprised; this was the first time Doctor Leland heard that Will Williams wanted to voluntarily switch cells. "Well let's see, we can't put you with Bane because he's in a cell with Croc and Pamela and Harley are girls so that leaves them out of the question."

"Why don't we just leave Will out of his cell?" The security guard from a couple nights ago asked.

"Didn't you hear what happened last time he had a chance to escape Arkham?"

"No, but I'd like to not know."

"Let's just say he has a TON of daughters and sons."

"A ton?"

"Yes…"

"Then why don't we leave out another Arkham villain?"

"And let them escape so the city can pull even more money out of our pockets for higher security?"

"So you want the mentally unstable psychopaths to get even more traumatized?"

"If it means saving money! I don't care how many inmates get butt raped as long as we keep them in their cells!"

"Doc listen to yourself!"

"No! You listen! I've been working in this hospital for years now and I don't want the name to get ruined by a couple of loons escaping because we didn't pair them up in cells!"

"Doc!"

"Don't 'Doc' me! We are throwing him in the first cell I choose!"

And that's exactly what happened and how Mr. Victor Freeze's new cellmate was a half frozen Will William.

"Y-you know Freeze? Being i-in th-the cold, I heard, is very good for the male reproductive organ-n." Will shivered, sounding unusually creepy for a half-frozen man, apparently not freezing to death was not so high up on his list of priorities .

"Uh, incorrect Mr. Williams; since it's so cold in here, your wiener has probably pulled a scared turtle."

"What?" Looking down his pants. "AH!"

"Yes…and not only mentioning that it's sub zero in here so you'll eventually pass out from hypothermia. Come to think of it why are you even in here? There are icicles hanging from the ceiling, the floor is made from ice, and it is literally snowing in the room. Seriously who thought this was a good idea to put you in here?!"

Mr. Freeze kept asking hypothetical questions directed at no one, while Will kept crying frozen tears, for the Raptor could not rape anyone that night.


	7. Your Love is My Drug

The guard pulled a Raping Raptor icicle from Mr. Freeze's room. "Ugliest snowman I've ever seen." He dropped it off near a heater so he would eventually thaw out. What? You thought the doctors were gonna thaw him out and make sure he's ok? HA! If the doctors thawed him out they wouldn't have a chance to escape before he tries something. After the thawing he returned to his usual schedule. Dr. Leland still didn't have enough money so she kept putting him in other cells. All inmates complained and the staff even had to hunt down Bane, since he escaped after hearing his roomy was going to be Will.

"Batman please! Don't put me back in there! I'm not even supposed to be going to Arkham, you know that!" Bane was currently suffering from another withdraw, and thus, could not fight back as Robin and Batman dragged him back into the dark halls of Arkham. "Please don't send me back to- HIM!"

Bruce glanced up and saw Will in the cell smiling.

"Him?" Bruce thought to himself.

"Oh hello Batman." Leland stepped up behind him.

"Good evening Dr. Leland; what's with the cell?"

"Well our funds got cut off again, oh and I see you have Bane."

"You do know that Bruce Wayne could probably raise money for you like he did last time."

"Well Batman, I'm afraid that Arkham's financial affairs are really none of your business."

"Br-Batmmmmmaaaaaaaaaannnnn." Dick wined.

"(Sigh) What is it Robin?"

"That guy in the cell said he was gonna rape me _and_ my cape!"

"Then maybe you shouldn't be messing with the inmates at Arkham." Looks at Leland. "Let me guess, Will William?"

She raised an eyebrow. "That's what his name is, yes."

"What's he doing in a cell with other people? Wasn't he the Raping Raptor?"

"Batman, I believe you've overstayed your welcome." Leland shooed the caped crusader towards the door.

"Seriously!? These are mentally unstable, traumatized criminal minds, and your throwing them in cells with other mentally unstable, traumatized criminal minds?"

"No we're not."

"Then why's Bane freaking out?"

"He's in the cell next to him."

"Ok…then why do I see Killer Croc and the Riddler playing cards in one room?"

"Uh…RIDDLER!"

Edward looked over.

"HOW'D YOU GET IN THERE!?" Leland acted as if this came as a surprise to her.

"I do believe you told me to sleep here Doctor." He went back to playing cards.

"RIDDLER!...ok we are pairing up cellmates, but we can't afford more then one room."

"You should call Bruce Wayne."

"But we already bothered him about the money, we can't possibly do it again."

"I think he'll agree to donating…oh and was Bane always his cellmate?"

"Uh…yes he was, luckily he wasn't attacked."

"Ok, as long as it was ONLY him, Bane can hold his own against this creep, the other criminals…I'm not so sure would cope with his…. advances."

"Of course."

"Come along Robin." Batman swooshed his cape and headed off down the hallway.

"Holy Dirty Dinos, Batman" Robin followed the Dark Knight out.

"Alright Bane, you'll have to-" She paused when she noticed Bane had disappeared. "Bane? Hm…" She glanced around and looked behind the potted plant. "Bane!"

"Don't put me in there!" Bane knelt down begging her.

"We…have…to…SAVE MONEY!" She forcefully kicked him in to the cell.

"NOOOOOOOOOO!" He yelled out; hitting the floor of the room, Dr. Leland slamming the door behind him and sprinting off into the night.

"Soooooo, your suffering from a withdraw?" William smiled looking down at the fallen criminal, slowly crossing the cell.

Bane was able to do two things in his existence, which was to be really strong and to be really smart, now since he wasn't strong he had to be smart with things. He panicked and tried finding a way out at first, and then it came to him. He started gagging and coughing.

"What is it?" Will raised an eyebrow.

Bane forced himself to throw up which made Will totally freak out.

"EEEEEWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!" He jumped to the corner of his bed.

Bane smiled and started yelling out to the hallway when the guards were still locking up. "HELP I NEED A DOCTOR! I'M NOT FEELING TOO GOOD!"

The guards ran down the hallway and glanced in. "Should we let him out? The doc told us not to let them out no matter how much they screamed."

"Dear God that's cruel." The other guard said.

"I know, but she's undah a lot of stress."

"Yeah but still."

"Hey, she's tha one givin' us our pay checks."

"I know, but what if he's sick and dies?"

"FINE! We'll bring him to the medical ward and then tomorrow we'll put him back in Black Gate….Where he is actually suppose to go." They opened the cell and got Bane out while they held a tranquilizer gun to the Raptor to make sure he doesn't pull anything. Bane acted as if he was going to pass out, but turned his head back slightly to flash a brief smile when they walked by the other inmates' cells. The guards had decided to not tell Doctor Leland they planned to not put anybody in the same cell with Will that night. They both knew that they'd get in a whole lot of trouble and probably suspended, but they also knew, deep down inside their hearts, everybody needed a break.

"GUYS YOU FORGOT TO CLEAN THE VOMIT IN MY CELL!" Raptor exclaimed into the hall. The guards continued to ignore him and left the area. "Oh never mind then!" He crossed his arms and threw the blanket on top of the puddle to stop the smell from spreading. "I solemnly swear…I WILL RAPE SOMEONE IN ARKHAM EVEN IF IT KILLS ME!"

"OH SHUT UP AND GO BACK TO BED YOU VILE CREATURE!"

"AND I'LL MAKE SURE IT'S YOU JERVIS!" He yelled out frowning.

"THAT WAS JONATHAN WHO SAID THAT! DON'T GET ME INVOLVED WITH THIS!" Jervis answered.

"I'LL RAPE THE BOTH OF YOU!"

"HA! WHAT A HORRIBLE COME BACK!"

"WHAT'S UP? YOU WANNA GET RAPED WITH THE TWO OF THEM OSWALD?!"

"I'M EDWARD!"

"WHO CARES?!" He covered his face in the pillow and screamed.

"JUST SHUDDUP I WANNA GET SOME SLEEP HERE!" Clayface banged on the glass.

All the inmates knew it was probably smarter to stay quite after getting yelled at from the person who surprisingly kept their mouth shut the whole week.

"Maybe next I'll get a chance. "William whispered to himself. "Maybe next time…heheheh."


	8. Don't Drop the Soap

A couple of weeks went by already, the only thing that happened was that the guards discovered Poison Ivy had escaped a month ago and nobody noticed. The other thing that happened that week was that the Raping Raptor had already been a roommate with two other people and he still hasn't got the chance to rape them. He was discouraged and knew that Dr. Leland would have no other choice then to put him in his own cell if everybody had complained about him.

"Oh whatever am I gonna do? Escape? Ah, if only I could rape you pillow…" He hugged his pillow in the corner of the bed. "I'll be alone…I don't want to be alone…GOD DAMMIT DAD THIS YOUR FAULT FOR TRAUMATIZING ME WITH DINOSAUR PORN! "

"Your dad traumatized you with dinosaur porn?" The guard stood at his opened door with a tranquilizer gun in his hands.

"What? _NO…_Umm…why did you open my cell?"

"Well it's shower day so go take a shower."

"Shower day?"

"Yes…"

"CAWABONGA!" Will leaped out of the room stripping all his clothes and running down the hall.

"GET BACK HERE!" The guard chased after him.

Meanwhile in the shower room all the other male inmates were lathering up for a good washing. They all had towels on in the shower because I'm not gonna include naked Arkham asylum guys, I'm not inappropriate. Anyway, they stood around and complained about Will William to each other.

"Can you believe the nerve of that doctor?! Why does she keep putting us in a cell with him?!" Jonathan complained.

"What? What'd he do to you guys." Edward chuckled.

"_If evEryBodY miNdeD thEir owN buSinEss, thE woRld woUld go arOuDnD a grEat deAl faSteR thAn it doEs_." Jervis quoted.

"What, is that directed towards me?"

"Maybe…"

"HA! Well at least **I **wasn't butt raped!"

"I was not!"

"Sure you weren't Hat; we'll just ask Mr. Freeze over here because he's a real doctor unlike you two." Looking over at Jonathan and Jervis.

"WHY AM I IN HERE!" Freeze yelled out. "WHO THOUGH IT WAS A GOOD IDEA TO PUT ME IN A SHOWER ROOM IF I DIE IN TEN DEGREES WEATHER?!"

"Calm down Vic, you aren't going to melt"

Victor melted.

"You know, I heard Ivy escaped about a month ago." Harvey told the group.

"Oh, yeah I think I remember her making a break for it around free period when that riot got started." Edward scratched his chin.

"Wish we'd thought about that."

"So, Harvey, what happened to you when Will was in your cell? I remember hearing a lot of yelling."

"I beat his pathetic ass."

"Hm."

"I mind controlled him and made him hit his head against the wall." Jervis budded in.

"Mind controlled? HA! I used my skills and outsmarted him." Jonathan proudly exclaimed.

"Oh really? When I looked in your cell, I specifically remembered you hiding in the corner of the ceiling."

"…" Jonathan frowned.

"Just saying." He shrugged.

"I THREW A ROCK AT HIM!" Croc yelled out.

"Good for you Croc. Maybe next week you could win the idiot award." Scarecrow patted him on the head.

"HEY!...Who won it this week?"

Edward stepped back a bit and observed, listening closely to all their complaints.

"GUESS WHO'S BACK!" Joker busted into the shower room (also wearing a towel cause I ain't no weirdo. Oh just to mention this is the black eyed Joker, not the one you guys know from the original animated series because I like this Joker better.)

"HOLD YOU APPLAUSE PLEASE!" He walked in shaking hands with all the upset inmates. "HEY THERE RIDDLE! HOW'S IT GOING ALLIGATOR! MR. FREEZE WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN HERE!" Walking past them he approached Jonathan. "WELL HEY THERE JOHNNY BOY!" He slapped the soap out from the professor's hands. "DON'T DROP THE SOAP! AHAHAHAHhehehe." He skipped off.

As the soap bounced on the floor a head poked out from around the corner belonging to Will. "Did I hear soap drop?"

Jonathan's heart sank as he stared at the bar of soap six inches across from him. "That was my only soap…" A single tear dropped from his face.

The other inmates stopped and stared, all thankful that it wasn't their soap, but they were worried for poor Scarecrow. It was dead silent among the inmates, the only sound to be heard was that of the running water and Jonathan did not dare to reach down for he knew the Raping Raptor was right around the corner, literally, staring in anticipation, watching his prey. With small paces he came to the wall and leaned his skinny back against it. All the inmates did not mutter a word and made no sound as they started hoping for Crane, hoping…that his plan might work. Jonathan Slid down from the wall his back still against it and sat on the floor. He used his foot and carefully started pushing the soap towards him without it getting away. When the bar was close enough to him he ever so slightly leaned forward and got the soap. Letting out a sigh of relief, the Arkhamites all yelled out in joy lifting the Scarecrow up like he just won the super bowl while 'Sweet Victory' played in the background.

"AW MAN!" Will snapped his fingers and faded back in the corner.

"HEY! SHOWER TIMES OVER!" The guard yelled in.

They all scattered back to the dressing room before they got yelled at again.

"Shoe-shine boy." Jervis walked over Edward putting his arm on his shoulder.

"Hm?"

"I did not appreciate what you said to me."

"I was just joking around buddy, you weren't supposed to take it to heart."

"Very well, go fetch me a towel."

"But you're already wearing a towel?"

"I know, I just need the other one for a cape, so go fetch it for me shoe-shine boy."

"No."

A few seconds later Jervis was left the locker room in his usual Arkham Asylum uniform and a towel cape. "Come along Towel-boy, its almost time for lunch."

Edward started murmuring insults about the Mad Hatter under his breath when he had another mind control chip placed on his neck.

"Hey Johnny?" Croc asked the man next to him.

He raised an eyebrow. "What is it?"

"If Joker's back, then doesn't that mean he'll probably be the next roommate for that dinosaur guy?"

Jonathan paused and looked up towards Croc with a huge sinister grin stretching ear to ear. "Yes Croc…He will be the next roommate…AHAHAHAHAHA!"

Thunder crashed in the distance.


	9. Last Laugh

Joker sat in the break room twiddling his thumbs; he knew he was going to be paired up in a cell with somebody and he wondered who it was going to be.

"Alright Joker, come along." The guard instructed him.

"So? Who's my roomy?"

"You'll see when we get there."

"Is it Red? We could be escape buddies." He chuckled.

"No, it's not Poison Ive'ay."

"Riddler?"

"No."

"Penguin?"

"No."

"Batman?"

"Oh my God no! Just get up and come with me!"

"No need to yell like that." He flipped over from the back of the couch and walked with the guard. "Is the person a newbie or something?"

"Something like that, it's his first year in Arkham Asylum, but he has been to Black Gate a couple of times before they named him criminally insane and sent him here."

"What'd he do?"

"…"

"Aw c'mon! Is there something your not telling me?" He titled his head to the side with a smile. "I do have at least the right to know who my roommate is?"

"Will Ricky William OK!?"

"…"

"Oh God don't start complaining too." The guard began rubbing his forehead.

"Who's Will Ricky Williams?"

After a brief pause, accompanied by a blank stare, the guard began to chuckle, Joker really didn't know who this guy was. "…heh…heheh…hehehAHAHAHAHAHAHAhehhhhhehhhhhehhh…Oh…um…HERE'S YOUR CELL!" They came up to the glass door and he threw Joker in and ran off before he could say anything.

"Ricky Williams?"

"Excuse me, it's Will Willia_m_." The raptor sat on his bed with his legs crossed and a pornographic magazine he snuck in.

"What? Do you expect me to know you?"

"(SIGH) I guess not…I haven't exactly been living up to my name lately…" He put his book away and stared at the ceiling.

"Name?"

"You're the Joker right?"

"Well of course I am!"

"Well you joke around and do things that are funny right?"

"All the time buckaroo!"

"Well…you've been living by the name Joker and I haven't been living by my name Raptor…"

"Raptor?...What the heck kind of name is that?"

"Never mind…forget I even asked you."

"Ok, say are you done with that magazine?"

"You wanna read this thing? There's like no raping at all; every last page is a picture of boobs. UGH! And I thought my twenty dollars were gonna be worth it."

"What?!"

"Yeah…you know?"

"No I do not!"

"Hm…ok…" He fell back on his bed and covered his face in the blanket.

"You my dear sir, are mentally disturbed." He grabbed the magazine flipping to the adds and leaned against the side of Will's bed.

Will pulled the blanket down to his nose and glanced to the side and sat up. He stuck his index finger out and poked the inside of Joker's ear.

"HEY! WHAT THE HELL!?" Joker slapped his finger away.

"I…I…" Tears ran down his face. "I RAPED THE JOKER!"

"WHAT?!"

"YEAH! THE DEFINITION OF RAPE IS PUTTING AN UNWANTED OBJECT IN TO ANOTHER PERSON'S ORAFICE!"

"…" The Joker stared, a disgusted look on his face.

"I RAPED THE JOKER!" Will hopped up and ran around the room making it be heard all across the halls. "I RAPED THE JOKER!"

Down the hall Harley was fixing her hair when she heard the commotion. "Wait…what?

(In the distance)"I raped the Joker!"

"WHAT HAPPENED TO MY PUDDIN'?!"

"I Will William, the Raping Raptor, have finally raped someone in Arkham! YIPPEE!" Will ran around the room clicking his heels while the Joker kept looking forward, his expression not changing.

The next morning Will skipped along humming a delightful tune towards the cafeteria to get some breakfast, when he was pulled away as the guards weren't paying attention.

"HUH?! Where am I?" Looking around one of the vacant doctor's office

Harley locked the door behind him and batted a plastic potted plant she took from the hallway. "So…you think you can rape my puddin' an get away with it?"

"Oh? A female locked in the same room as me? Well I don't know about you, but I would not like to be locked in here with…" Leaps in the air. "THE RAPING RAPTOR!"

She swatted him away with the plant, which caused him to hit the ground headfirst. She lifted him up by the collar and punched him, and continued to do so until the guards noticed he was gone for a half hour.

They looked around and soon heard a women yelling and what appeared to be gurgling sounds coming from the doctor's office. "HEY HEY HEY!" They ran inside after using their keys to unlock the door. Opening the door they discovered the yelling came form Harley as she was beating a gurgling Raptor to a pulp. "Whoa…she beat him up didn't she?...You know…we don't HAVE to stop her."

"Yeah but Leland's gonna fire our asses if we don't stop 'er."

"True…(SIGH!) I really don't wanna be on bitch duty today, c'mon Quinn." He lifted her up and tried to restrain her.

"AIN'T NO WAY I'M LETTIN' HIM GET AWAY! LET GO OF ME!" She tried squirming out of the grip of the guard.

"C'mon Harley, it's time to calm down…"

"Hey Joe? Did you take a look at this guys face, Jeez…..(whistle) and it looks like he has a couple broken bones." The guard began poking at Will's unconscious body.

"(SIGH!) Just take him to the infirmary!"

"Oh alright." He put Raptor's arm around his shoulder and carried him off while the other guard struggled to keep Harley back from killing him.


	10. Alas poor Will, I knew him well

(LAST CHAPTER! HOPE YOU ENJOY!)

When all the Arkham inmates filed into the cafeteria the next morning a familiar face was waiting for them.

"Well, it sure is nice to be back here isn't it?" Poison Ivy sat in her usual spot in the lunchroom not knowing what went on in Arkham for the last couple of months. "So I've heard the funds have been cut in half again? Pretty obvious since I wouldn't even feed my plants this gruel." She picked at her plate with her fork and the noticed the other male inmates didn't seem to be saying anything. "…What's with you guys today?"

"We…had a long week…"Riddler sighed not wanting to say anything further; it was one thing if the doctor's knew what had happened the last few weeks, but it was another if Ivy ever got hold of the information. All the painful hours that she'd keep talking about what happened and all the times she would probably laugh at them or giggle slightly as they walked by. Every last one of the inmates knew it was probably better to keep their mouth's shut, even Harley thought so.

"ATTENTION ARKHAM INMATES!" Dr. Leland spoke over the intercom. "WILL RICKY WILLIAM IS NOW HOSPITALIZED, AND WILL NO LONGER BE A ROOMMATE TO ANY OTHER INMATE FROM NOW ON BECAUSE OF HIS CONDITION!"

"WOOOOOOOOOOOH!" Edward, Jervis, Jonathan, Harvey, Dummy and Scarface, Mr. Freeze puddle, Croc, and Joker all jumped out in the air celebrating and high fiving each other. Harley was even squealing with joy, while Ivy sat in silence, utterly lost to why all the inmates seemed to be so relieved.

"AND FURTHER MORE YOU DON'T EVEN NEED ROOMMATES SINCE BRUCE WAYNE HAS DONATED MORE MONEY TO THE ASYLUM!"

The inmates cheered even louder and Poison Ivy curiously tilted her head to the side.

"GO RICH GUY!" Jonathan yelled.

"I used to work for him, he was MY boss." Jervis proudly announced.

"Well who cares he was the one who bought MY Minotaur Maze!" Edward budded in trying to out do the Mad Hatter.

Poison Ivy came up to the group. "Wow! I didn't know you guys liked your own cells THAT much?"

"_AND _EVEN FURTHER MORE!" Leland went on. "I'M SORRY ABOUT THE WHOLE RAPTOR INCADENT!"

"SSSSSSSHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHhhhhhh!" All the guys smiled dropped and they all spun around to desperately try to stop her before she continued…it didn't work.

"I'M SORRY I HAVE STUCK YOU MEN IN A CELL WITH WILL WILLIAM FORMALLY KNOWN AS THE RAPING RAPTOR!"

The group of guys covered their ears; maybe she wouldn't say anything if they couldn't hear it,….sorta. Suddenly though, this speech just became a whole lot more interesting for Pamela Isely.

"SO NOW I WILL APOLOGIZE TO EACH AND EVERY ONE OF YOU; I AM SORRY EDWARD YOU WERE ALMOST RAPED! I AM SORRY JERVIS YOU HAD ALMOST BEEN RAPED! I AM SORRY JONATHAN YOU HAD ALMOST BEEN RAPED! I AM SORRY HARVEY YOU HAD ALMOST BEEN RAPED!"

"HA!" Ivy burst out while Two-Face hit his head repeatedly on the table, groaning and cursing under his breath.

"I AM SORRY WAYLON YOU HAD ALMOST BEEN RAPED! I AM SORRY VICTOR YOU HAD ALMOST BEEN RAPED! AND FINALLY SORRY JOKER, YOU HAD BEEN RAPED IS WHAT I HEARD! I AM SORRY YOU HAVE BEEN RAPED BY WILL WILLIAM!"

Poison Ivy busted out in to laughter while Joker covered his face from embarrassment and shame. "He just poked me in the ear…it's not funny." He murmured.

"I think it's hilarious!"

When Dr. Leland was done with her speech all the male inmates who had been mentioned all covered their faces behind food treys and pretended that they didn't exist, trying to blend in with the background.

"Well I think that cleared everything up!" Dr. Leland proudly exclaimed to the two guards next to her. "I think all the inmates have forgiven me, and certainly understand the pressure I had been under, and are very happy to hear this apology."

"Sure doc." The guard told her. "I think they're REAL happy…"

"YOU GUYS WERE ALMOST RAPED BY THE RAPING RAPTOR! I STILL CAN'T BELIEVE IT!" Pamela laughed about it almost the whole lunch period while the inmates ignored her and tried devising a plan.

"Ok guys, here's the plan; we sneak in to the infirmary in the middle of the night." Edward went on with the group getting excited. "And kill that bastard Will while he's sleeping!"

"YEAH!" The group exclaimed, but alas when the time came and they were about to kill the Raping Raptor, Batman was waiting for them and of course carried them back to their cells.

"I don't get it! How'd he find us!?" Harvey yelled out while getting carried away handcuffed.

"Nygma…did you?" Jonathan glared.

"Did I leave a riddle for Batman?! Of course not…"

Jervis hit him on the back of the head with his handcuffs. "Tell the truth Tooth-Brush Boy!"

"OW!...yeah I did leave a riddle behind."

"(SIGH!) Nice going Nygma!"

"HEY! At least I didn't try to scare Batman away by spraying him with _Febreeze _pretending it was fear toxin!"

"Oh, would you two be quite! I'm already getting a headache from this." Jervis pushed at the other two causing them to bump in to Harvey.

"HEY IT'S YOUR FAULT WE'RE IN THIS SITUATION!" Two-Face hit Jervis with his elbow. "YOU AND YOUR FAULTY MIND CONTROL CHIP! DID YOU THINK IT WOULD REALLY WORK ON BATMAN!"

The Mad Hatter fell back a few steps and rubbed his injured arm. "Well at least I wasn't distracted flipping a quarter!"

"THAT'S IT!" Breaking away from Batman's grip he lounged forward on to Jervis followed by Edward getting knocked back and Jonathan getting freaked out causing him to hide under Batman's cape.

"HEY YOU TWO!" The Dark Knight tried separating the both of them but then tripped over Scarecrow causing him to fall on Riddler.

Joker and Croc were the only two to stay relatively quite and so, making the best of this opportunity, Croc started sprinting away, as Joker pointed and laughed hysterically at the scene in front of him.

"UGH!" Batman threw his batarangs at Crocs feet causing him to trip. He lifted himself up and tossed Harvey back; finally after an hour of getting them under control he got them all in to their cells. Joker laughed all the way there, too.

"Wow thank you Batman!" The guard ran over. "How were you able to capture them all?"

"I'm Batman."

"I don't think that's an appropriate response." The looked away for a split second, "How'd you really-" Turning back, Batman had already disappeared. "Hm…" He scratched his head. "What a rude dude." He whistled the tune from Looney Tunes and went on with his marry way, that is, until his walky talky went off.

"EMERGENCY! WILL WILLIAM HAS ESCAPED ARKHAM! I REPEAT, THE RAPING RAPTOR IS OUT ON THE STREETS!"

The guard pulled out a pair of tinted shades and placed them on his face. "…MOTHER OF GOD!"

The End.


End file.
